3 Bars on God's Heart, and mine [Part 3]

Over the last month I have become a familiar face amongst the hundreds of tourists who come for pleasure here in the bars Phuket, Thailand. Greeted by name by the women working my favorite bars, my drink is prepared as I make my rounds, making sure to say hello to everyone in the bar. Something as outrageous as this on amissions trip would have me sent home during the Outreach phase of my DTS, however this particular trip has it seen as a huge accomplishment and reason to praise God!

To the back of a side street alley we go to our last bar of this series. Looking down the street you see a metal warehouse which you can enter on the other side to witness an array of vendors, mostly from Nepal or Burma. The other side of the street back here is lined with about 7 sports bar type with 5-8 girls working at each. Our first night here and the music was more overwhelming than anything else, causeing one to practically put mouth to ear in order to hear. At this bar the girls were shy and their limited english proved an extra block in communication. The Lord made a way and my teammate, Gulya, has connected with a young girl named Hope, who has been working the bar for a few months.

As Gulya and Hope spend their time together talking or playing table tennis (definitely their favorite activity), I talk with the men there. Now I will say that in all honesty, this has been hard, it wasn't my goal, but has proven a blessing to Gulya as I in a since keep the men distracted and entertained long enough to give Hope time to talk. Some nights I enjoy the conversations, like the night we met Rojer. A German contractor who's skill has taken him around the world and given him opportunity to spend several months a year in Thailand where he has a condo in the mountains with the monkeys. After his wife died a few years back, he is a man trying to do right by his own understanding. Though misguided and lonely, Rojer has a compassionate heart only missing what the Lord can provide. Talking with him was comfortable and enjoyable, spending half the time praying in the spirit for him I can say that it was a great conversation and I won't mind running into him again.

Other nights are not so welcomed, the worst of these when all the bar owner's friends were in. A loud and sketchy crowd of Italians, rolled in as we were waiting for Hope to be dropped off by a customer she'd left with earlier that night.

We were going to see Hope, making her our first stop as we'd called earlier and she'd wanted to see us at 9:30. However we walked up just in time to see her and a few of the girls, jumping on the back of a motor bike with a customer. She saw us to and the look of sadness that came across her eyes, immediately followed by a visible facade of bubbly joy, was enough to stir anyone's heart. Telling us to come back later as the man drove off, we stood in the alley for a good minute processing what to do next, deciding to move on and hopefully catch her later. Returning a while later Hope still wasn't back so we sat down at the bar and ordered drinks, hoping and quietly praying she'd return soon. A few minutes later the bikes rolled in and the bar came to life. All the seats filled and beside me an older Italian man named Marco sat; as introductions went around the cashier, a beautiful Thai woman with long straight black hair made a fuss about him being to old to talk with me. In good spirits he laughed and called over his younger friend who was down a ways to take his seat, appeasing all in the bar. Marcelo, a man in his early 30s, had been in the area for several weeks looking for a condo to buy into with a friend. Hope and Gulya were at the end of the bar, faced away and leaning in with conversation going well; Allysha to my other side, now talking with Marco who had no other place to sit with the bar packed; I sat and tried my best to keep conversation going the way I wanted it to go. However, as the conversation played out he made a point to tell how interested he was in taking me out for the night, and more than a few times. Between the awkward conversation, the loud music that required us to be so intentional in staying completely engaged, and the frustration of the language barrier I faced surrounded by Thai and Italian, I was more than ready to leave when Hope was called on by another customer.

Every night is it's own and there is no telling what it will look like going in, but no matter the events that happen we always leave with a somber hopefulness for these girls. The excitement and hope in these girls' eyes as we spend time together, and the promise that God will give them opportunity and reveal Himself to each of their hearts, has ministered to our hearts each time. My prayers will always include each of these young women I have become friends with here in Phuket.

Even though we may never see the fruit of our work in Phuket, I know that not a moment went to waste for it was through His power, Spirit, strength, and His glory that we went out each night. Praise the Lord, for He is good, He is just, and He is mighty to save!

"I am the Lord, and I will bring you out from under the burdens of [those over you], and I will deliver you from slavery to them, and I will redeem you with an outstretched arm and with great acts of judgment. I will take you to be my people, and I will be your God, and you shall know that I am the Lord your God, who has brought you out from under the burdens... I am the Lord." Ephesians 6:6-7

Love Always

3 Bars on God's Heart, and mine [Part 2]

Over the last month I have become a familiar face amongst the hundreds of tourists who come for pleasure here in the bars Phuket, Thailand. Greeted by name by the women working my favorite bars, my drink is prepared as I make my rounds, making sure to say hello to everyone in the bar. Something as outrageous as this on amissions trip would have me sent home during the Outreach phase of my DTS, however this particular trip has it seen as a huge accomplishment and reason to praise God!

Bar 2: we were called in from far the very first night! Not by name, but rather in a 'sexy lady! hallo! welcome!" kind of way. Entering the first night on the streets it was an entirely new experience as we were "cat called" into the bar and then given our drinks in glasses the shape of naked women. Here there are about 10 "ladies" working, including at least one ladyboy. [For those who don't understand the term ladyboy let me explain by saying that it describes a beautiful woman who at one point, was a man. These people pepper the streets of Phuket and flamboyantly sell themselves amidst the women on the street and in bars.] This bar, while at first very difficult to stay in has some of the sweetest connections I have. The first night the girls actually left us alone, choosing to sit up a front table where they could call in more customers, and leaving those in the bar without company (very rare).

After a couple minutes of sitting awkwardly at the bar I chose to make a place for myself at their table and since then have become very good friends with several of them. Lydia, pictured to the left, is one of my closest friends there and I think she is the manager as she seems to call most of the shots. Not only sharing much about her own life, she has told me more about the bar and the girls then even they will tell. From her I have learned that the boss never comes in, but he only "accepts" girls from a certain city in Thailand. While all of the girls will say that they are at least 20, the newest young girl is only 17. Lydia has has taken me more as a little sister, always reminding me to be careful.

Allysha and I have taken to the older woman working as cashier named Ruth. This woman is different than most, sometimes I feel that she has one of the thickest facades of all of them, other times I am puzzled by her open affection for us. We haven't learned much from her, or any of the girls working there really, but she doesn't want to be there and that's apparent. Also one of the women I have come to connect with is Hannah. She and I both have something in common and that is that the first night I visited that bar, was also her first night in the bar. The Thai culture is very conservative in how they dress: not showing shoulders, nothing above the knees, if your married your hair is up in a bun. This is the attire of a "respectful" Thai woman, and this is how I met Hannah. Now she straightens her long black hair every night, slips on her tight fitting, revealing dress that is covered in sequins, and sits amongst men who only care to pay her for what she is, not caring who she is.In the last month of watching her adjust to this profession my heart has been broken for her. It's just not right that anyone should be so bound by their poverty that they have to be so humiliated with themselves. Hannah speaks no english so most of our communication has been through simply sitting with her and praying over her softly to myself.

The last time we visited bar 2 we found it shut down with no trace of service. Later walking by another street, the girls called out to us and we learned that the bar owner (who owns several bars in the area) had decided to shut it down and move them to another bar. Nevertheless, Praise God for answering our prayers and closing down that bar!!!

This bar has a very different set-up as the front is an open picnic table area, then you can enter into the second area behind which has a stage with live music, bar, and pool table. We spent a couple hours hanging out with Ruth, Lydia, and Hannah hearing horror stories (ex: of a handsome man who murdered his "girlfriend" from the neighboring bar just 3 months prior, because she wouldn't have sex with him), playing pool together, and simply being encouraged by each other's friendship over drinks. During this time Hannah had Lydia translate for her as she told me how much she loved seeing me and how it made her so happy when I came and just sat with her, even though we couldn't speak to each other. At that moment as we sat hand in hand, with Lydia translating, I was nearly brought to tears as the Lord gave me a glimpse of the difference we are making to these women.

This ministry has been difficult if not just because we don't see "results" right away, instead seeing the deep pit of complications these women have stumbled into. It is a struggle, that we are constantly battling, to remember the hope, opportunity, and the possibility of a way out for these women. And if it wasn't for the hope and love God has for them, we would fall into the same despair and oppression of the circumstances. Praise God that our prayer have authority, and that through them His hand is moved! Praise God that we can confidently proclaim hope, change and that God's vision for these places will in fact become a reality!

I love Hannah. And wish, with all that I am, that I could take her away from this city, from this bar, from this job. She deserves more. She needs Jesus.

*names changed for the protection and respect of these precious women*

Love Always

3 Bars on God's Heart, and mine [Part 1]

Over the last month I have become a familiar face amongst the hundreds of tourists who come for pleasure here in the bars Phuket, Thailand. Greeted by name by the women working my favorite bars, my drink is prepared as I make my rounds, making sure to say hello to everyone in the bar. Something as outrageous as this on a missions trip would have me sent home during the Outreach phase of my DTS, however this particular trip has it seen as a huge accomplishment and reason to praise God!

At our first bar we are called out to from across the street, welcomed in with hugs and greetings all around. The men at the bar wait as we check on how all of the ladies are doing, paying attention to each individually and with the care as if sisters. There are 8 women working in this bar, some speak good english, others can only talk with their eyes. Here we have met many customers from Germany, Sweden, Switzerland, United States, and Norway who come for a holiday to the warmer and "friendlier" climate of Thailand while the chill is over their native countries. After a time of meeting and greeting I make it a habit to search out the bar owner, Jubilee, a flashy older woman whom I have grown close to in the last few weeks. Some nights she is either bustling about, making sure the buffet attached to the bar is fully serviced, keeping the bar customers fully amused and thirsty at that, or down the road at a friends' bar partying it up. Other nights, when the streets are quieter and the previous night's drinks still hitting heavy, she and I talk about life and spend the time enjoying each other's company.

This woman has been through it all, and has the stories like most of the girls we've come to know. Coming down from her village as an 18 year old looking for a job to help support her family in the promising city of Phuket, finding none other than one serving drinks in a bar, not making enough to send the 6-8000฿ back to her family, taking on escorting and selling something that can be sold over and over again just to care for her parents. Decades later Jubilee now runs a bar and buffet where girls come to work and send money back to their families, customers come for drinks and leave with a beautiful Thai woman on their arm. Her parents have passed away but now she supports her 3 children (who are my age) as they pursue education. She serves me watermelon and dragon fruit as we talk and laughs at the young men who loudly protest when I decline their offers for drinks, "she's a good girl," she will tell them - a look of both pride and of wishful sorrow passed in the loving gaze we share. Only a few feet from each other, yet worlds apart. No longer does she think of her own wishes, now all she wants is a better life for her darling children that she hears from every other week. Whatever the cost.

At this bar we've given several of the girls information about what SHE is and how what they can look forward to here including English lessons, hotel/restaurant training, and job opportunities. Two girls we are praying for specifically - the first is Mia, a 31 year old woman, (photographed here between Gulya and myself) who has a 7 year old daughter who is cared for by the grandparents, and whom we have been actively pursuing. She used to be a very good dress maker, so she tells us, but it did not pay enough to send home so she came to the bar last year and has been working nearly every night since. The second, Tessa, (not photographed) is a young woman who has been working only 3 months and who latched onto us since day one, desperate for the friendship. We have given her information as well, but something seems to be blocking and we haven't gotten a positive response yet.

Please keep these women in your prayers as we will be spending our last 2 nights with them this week! We praise God for the ability to have faith in the unseen and hope for the future of these women in SHE, wether or not we ever get to hear about the fruit of our ministry or not, we pray that they come to know the Lord and find restoration in who He is!

*names changed for the protection and respect of these precious women*

Love Always

praying for restoration

"we happy when see 3 beautiful ladies come," said one of our bar friends in her broken english. This is a phrase we have come to hear many times over as the friendships we are building are becoming a source of true joy and hope for these women.

Another bar calling us the "good girls" - a title most American youth would shy to be called such. Here, that title is a testimony of the walk we are living and a joy that those we are focusing our ministry on see us as such too. This bar has come to be one of our favorites as we are welcomed with joyful greetings, or meaningful looks into our eyes for the women who cannot express in english, the joy it is to have us with them.

In just 6 visits we have gone from being just another customer to entertain, to being a friend who they know genuinely cares about how they are today. What a blessing!

Many fliers for SHE have gone into girls' hands. Ones for english lessons, job training, job opportunities as SHE, and "meditation"/english lessons have been copied, shared, and spread throughout several of the bars we have been focusing on. This is only the beginning, yet all that we can physically do to get these women out, so all we can do now is pray.

The other night one of the team's girls went to them, ready to leave and come back to SHE with us right then. I recall my dormmate's voice saying, "the devil is alive" though as he definitely stuck fear, confusion, and plenty of lies and in the chaos of that the girl ended up working another night. Luckily she still wanting out and after some follow up she is nearly ready to walk away! -Please be praying for her specifically as we battle for her restoration!

"For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places." Eph 6:14

Also, be praying for the many other women who have the resources and opportunities at their fingertips - that they would be willing to take the risk and come out of their current jobs to come through SHE. For their softened hearts, for peace, for joy and for courage as we intercede on their behalf now, knowing that our prayers move the hand of God and confidently claiming the victory over these women's lives!

Love Always

Lice Party!

Lounging on my bunk above Ivy. On some weird antibiotics that make me light headed. I’m sick with nasty stomach cramps reminding me so every time I move- or laugh- which tonight, has been often.

Abbie’s washing her hair of lice. She’s been using my brush, and Ivy’s brush, Ivy used Jacque’s hat today, and Catherine was snuggling with Abbie last night. Poor thing's miserable. Maybe we should all get roti to make us feel better - what? who said that?

Catherine is freaking out, just a little bit, which is one of the funniest things to watch. She’s paranoid about the lice, so Katie just tells her to “google it! -seriously, do it.”

Katie’s bunk is by the door. Everyone sits on it, lays on it and puts their stuff on it. She’s rebuking the lice and claiming freedom over all of them in our room. Amen sista!

Marissa finally finished No Compromise by Melody Green, she’s wanted to finish it since last week. Basically big sister to all of us, she and I often talk with our eyes and end up grinning about everything. She got a gnarly burn on her leg this morning- hope it doesn’t scar.

Allysha has dozed off to the melodies of her iPod. Could have sworn she was sweeping just a moment ago. I’m tempted to steal whatever she stored in the fridge from dinner.

Ivy’s doing something on her computer, probably emailing her boyfriend. She’s sweet, falls asleep during the debriefs after bar nights, and I love having her as a bunk mate here in Phuket.

Guyla is somewhere. Not really sure where but probably with a guitar and those corn snack things in hand. Her English has been improving so much! Though I love hearing the murmuring as she prays in Tajik, or Russian, or is she speaking in tongues? We don’t know either, but love it.

Jacque’s rustling around in her “cave.” Food wrappers crinkling, headphones on. A loud shuffling of papers, blankets, pillows, computer, books, and whatever else is inhabiting the “cave” indicates she’s lost her glasses again. She’s doing an amazing job of organizing us just the same and we love her dearly.

“It takes a week for a lice egg to hatch” reads Catherine. My head itches. All of us are going to get lice. But it’s ok, we’re on outreach and “it could be worse.”

Morning has arrived. I have lice. We tore our room apart and are boiling sheets and pillow cases. "Team time" today is "clean time" - we're all going to spend the afternoon washing, combing, pruning, and grooming. I'm going to have 6 inches of hair cut off. It's a party!

We are getting along great and I couldn’t ask for a better team!

Well, maybe one without so much hair... lol Just kidding!

Love Always

Interlude.

Sick.

For the first time since leaving the country my body is angrily refusing to keep anything down. It's hot, humid, and I'm secreting a film of sweat as I lay here on my bunk. I'm sipping on salty electrolyte water, with a fan on my face, and antibiotics working on my stomach. Taking advantage of the time - I want to share what the Lord has planned for me after outreach.

Haiti.

That's right, the co-inhibitor of a small Caribbean island not 3 hours on a plane from the states, but world's apart in status of living. A country known for it's dark practices that run deep within the veins of generations, but who were heard crying out for "Jesus" in the midst of the earth's loud groans.

Port-Au-Prince.

Home to perhaps the largest and most chaotic tent city in existence. 5 – 7 thousand people crammed into makeshift houses with only feet or inches separating each tattered tent. Human beings living like cattle...victims of circumstance. [thank you Jon Hatton, my brother in Haiti]

YWAM.

Going on staff for the first DTS ever run in PAP with an incredible team of dreamers and disciples of Christ. Giving the only thing I have, myself, to no longer consider that mine either. I have given my life, my comfort, my dreams and aspirations - all for the sake of Him who first loved me.

Thoughts.

What am I doing? What about family? College? Am I really going to lead others, some of them will be older than me. Haiti is unstable, even dangerous. I'm a young, single, woman, going into one of the darkest and most crowded places on earth. No college degree, no special "skill set" to utilize, just myself and My God. The world tells me this is absolute foolishness.

Affirmation.

The Lord chose me and has called me to go. He has promised that the anointing for the season, He will provide. He has been preparing me for years. And is further preparing me for what He created me to do. My youth will inspire others and my faith carry through. A maturity and wisdom imparted beyond my years. Knowing I am His Daughter. Understanding the authority and power I walk in as His heir. If even that means I've learned how to call out in my lacking. I am found safest in His will. He will never forsake me. What I have to give to Him, He will multiply and use for the greatness of His Glory. That it is nothing I can do, but Him through me. No pressure, just joy and a willingness to follow my Beloved Shepherd.

Vision.

To positively change the youth of this nation; to raise up righteous leaders; to influence current leaders; to touch with His heart; to help with His hands; to empower with His Spirit; to inspire and encourage disciples of Christ.

Submission.

Every day and every hour- to His authority, His power, His will, His plans. It's not possible by anything I can do, anything the staff can do, any human can do; only He can do these things.

Need.

More of Him and less of me. His strength. His comfort. His Spirit within. His love. More.

$6,000 - for insurance, room/board, plane tickets, outreach fees (praying about leading to Jamaica) all included. No big.

Dedicated prayer warriors. It's not going to be easy. It's a battle each day- for joy, for hope, for wisdom and for peace.

More about On-Location: Haiti DTS:

http://uofnkona.edu/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=648&Itemid=723&lang=en

Love Always

Roses from Ashes

So now we've been here 2 weeks and I'm finally getting down to writing about what's going on here. My team has started ministry in a raw area, and so far we've only been in the bars there 5-6 nights, but the relationships being built with these girls is unbelievable! We went in thinking it was going to be hard talking to the girls, but really they WANT to talk, most all of them hating their jobs and what they have to do for money. My ministry squad of 3 teammates includes Allysha from Canada, Gulya from Tajikistan, and myself from the USA - and so far we have only been into a handful of the bars (of about 80 in the 5 streets/alleys) but have made a few friendships that are very promising!

Going in some nights I’ve found myself begging God for a heart for these people because I just didn't want to be in a truck on my way to such a place. I hate that such a ministry is needed, am saddened by the hopelessness we see in these women's eyes, and am filled with a righteous anger with the offense of God's Holy Name on this island. I have cried out and in His faithfulness to answer has been encouraging me with when one of our bars we were revisiting welcomed us in, thrilled to see us - it was so Apparent, the difference in how they treated us from the first night. They knew we weren't there for anything but to talk and hang out with them, and they knew that we had something different.

Last night as we were leaving that bar, a young Norwegian guy made a scene about us leaving and not sticking around to meet his friends. The bar owner laughed at him and explained how we were good girls; we came had a drink without alcohol and just hung out with them. They see us as "good girls" and that's exactly what we’d been praying for. It was also great hearing this coming from the bar owner as the ministry can be completely shut down by an owner who gets uncomfortable and ugly about us not buying alcohol and keeping the girls from entertaining, so praise the Lord that their is a positive response to our presence! Another group had the bar girls mentioning that they had seen them and "liked them" because they weren't dressed like tourists, indicating the short shorts and revealing shirts - but rather that we dressed like Thai, nicely put together, comfortable, and not too revealing. This was another encouragement to dress modestly - even in the scorching 90* weather with 80% humidity.

Matt 10:38 is still hanging over us. In praying before leaving last night God put it on my heart to really pray that my team, all girls, not be a stumbling block or distraction to feed the lust in these men we’d be meeting. By the end of the night I truly felt how much that prayer was needed, my night’s conversations were mostly men looking for something unattainable where they were at. It was hard to stay and talk to a few of them, knowing i was just entertaining, but necessary so that the other girls on my squad could hold a conversation with the bar girls. Praise God for His grace and protection that even when in those situations there is something that will be seen differently, that those men will come to terms with their unsatisfied souls, and for their hearts to be tender to those God will put in their paths. He loves each of them and my heart is broken for their empty hearts in the search for love, worth, and purpose. May the Lord bring them all to a place of encountering His love and may each heart be transformed to run after Him - a satisfying race indeed!

Love Always

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly." ~Matthew 10:10

It's about a halfway point of our outreach and I think everyone has hit a rough spot at some time in the last week. Praise God for my team! As one of us gets these feelings, another will be there to hold you up and encourage you, reminding you that, "We did not fly halfway around the world to be tired." We came here to be God's hands and feet to these women, and surely His strength will move the body. We came to work at this ministry to break ground in an area of red light bars that have most likely never heard about Christ, are stuck by their circumstances, hopeless, and who long for a pure and loving relationship that doesn't leave them with a nasty hangover and guilt the next morning. So while it's hard for us, we should be joyful because we've already been promised victory through Christ in these places.

As I led the bible study this morning on Romans 5:1-5, God led me to the hope and confidence we have in His Name. The passage goes as such:

"Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.”

For me just the basic claiming this as truth over the ministry here was what truly touched me when reading through this:

I am Justified to be doing this ministry by my faith and have Peace in it.

I Stand in His Grace and Rejoice in the Hope of His Glory being revealed to this city, people, and nation.

I can rejoice also in the suffering, the exhaustion, the tests and trials, and the discipline I have faced here. And I can do that because of Hope. “

My hope for change will not put me to shame. I can say with confidence and full expectation, “that bar will be a coffee shop, that one an art gallery of ocean scenes, this bar will be a children’s day care, and those 4 on the corner over there - will be a global community center.” The world tells me that that it is impossible and foolish to really think that all of will come true- but my hope and belief that “if you have faith and do not doubt, you will not only do what has been done to the fig tree, but even if you say to this mountain, ‘Be taken up and thrown into the sea,’ it will happen” [matt 21:21] So then I can declare the change of this island from being a sex tourism industry, to being a place for families to come and experience the beauty of Thailand together.

I know this all to be true and can walk in such because God's love filters through my heart, as the Spirit dwells within.

His heart and mine are becoming more and more entwined and this is my prayer. That I continue to give up my life every moment, that the Holy Spirit's inhabitance in me takes the place of my heart, that His love becomes my blood, that with each breath I inhale His sweet presence, and that with every second I be even more so aware of He that is In me.

"Peace be to the brothers [and sisters], and love with faith, from God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. Grace be with all who love our Lord Jesus Christ with love incorruptible." Ephesians 6:23

Love Always